“I Just Got Dress Coded” — Mom Shows Outfit Librarian Shamed Her for Wearing

"Tell her supervisor! That is totally inappropriate of her to say. Your outfit is fine."

Mustafa Gatollari - Author
By

Apr. 10 2024, Published 12:57 p.m. ET

Woman Shows Outfit that Got Her Dress Coded at Local Library
Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom

Saturday Night Live did such a good job of making fun of mom jeans and the de-sexualizing nature of these pants, that they somehow became an un-ironic fashion staple that even non-moms have enjoyed dressing up over the years.

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The best comedy often hits a situation with truth, and the mom jeans one hits on a phenomena that many women have said they've faced — being judged for their appearance, especially when it comes to what is considered "age appropriate" clothing.

This is exactly what TikToker Hilary Flips (@calmlychaoticmom) said she experienced while at the library with her kids when a librarian who didn't approve of her clothing came up to her and shamed her for what she was wearing. Hilary relayed her story in a viral clip that she posted to the widely-used video-sharing application.

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Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom

"So I just got dress coded at our local library at baby story time and this is literally what happened. So this is what I wore, a little cropped sweater situation, it's from like the teenager section at Target. It's that like weird, wild fable brand. Probably not age appropriate whatever."

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She continues to talk about the outfit that got her "dress coded" at the library, "These jeans, they're topshop mom jeans, a thousand years old, they're literally called like the mom jean. And this is what I wore," she says, while fidgeting with her hair in front of the camera.

mom dress coded librarian
Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom
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"And I thought that wearing a sweater is like a step up from my usual sweatshirt, t shirt, leggings, jeans situation so I was feeling good about myself.

That good feeling was short-lived, thanks to the library employee, Hilary explained: "And she ruined that."

The TikToker continued, "So, I'm chasing my kids around they're acting wild and I always get a little stressed out that they're, they don't sit during story time. So after story time this librarian comes up to me and she goes are you mom or babysitter? And I thought oh my gosh she thinks I'm young so I go oh I'm mom not the babysitter."

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mom dress coded librarian
Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom

Hilary delivers her statement as if she's graciously accepting a compliment with a smile, but the conversation turns in a different direction from where she thought it was headed: "So she goes you should know better in like this judgy, tsk, tsk kind of tone and so I immediately start apologizing for my girls' behavior."

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The mom thought the librarian's judgmental comment was geared towards the behavior of her children running around the library, which prompted her to launch into apologetic mode, "I'm so sorry, you know it's really hard for them to sit still like we're working on it. Like that's kind of why we come here and you know whatever."

mom dress coded librarian
Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom
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Hilary soon discovered that the librarian's gripe wasn't with the behavior of her children, but the clothes that she was wearing, "And she goes no your outfit. And I'm thinking oh my gosh what did I like not button my sweater up? Like what's happening? And she just like motions to it and I realize it's because it's a little bit cropped."

Apparently, the librarian didn't like the fact that the mom was wearing a sweater and shirt that was a tad bit on the cropped side, "When I carry my giant one year old it like raises up and shows maybe like one inch of my like mommy belly with its cute little stretched out belly button."

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mom dress coded librarian
Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom

The mom continued with her story, "And apparently, apparently that's inappropriate to show any midriff when you're like edging into 40 and newsflash, I guess, I disagree," she says at the end of the video, throwing shade to the librarian's commentary on what she's wearing.

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Hilary's caption for the video also added further context on how much she didn't appreciate the gratuitous commentary from the librarian, writing: "Pardon me while I continue to wear cropped tops with high-waisted pants until I’m a grandmother. Might even throw my bellybutton ring back in for extra flair"

Other TikTokers joined in the offense that Hilary felt during her library visit. One person penned, "My daughter has taken to saying, 'What an odd thing to say out loud.' To people like that. You look fabulous. Nevermind her."

Another joked, "Tube top and daisy dukes at the next story time!"

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mom dress coded librarian
Source: TikTok | @calmlychaoticmom

Someone else, who wrote that they work as a librarian and speaking to a visitor like this has never once even crossed their mind: "I’ve been a librarian for 13 years and this is WILD. Our unspoken rule is “come as you are!”"

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